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I was officially diagnosed with severe Anxiety and panic disorder 10 years ago, although I had suffered from both my entire life. This has been a long hard journey. It was filled with medications and hundreds of different doctors to try to help me with my situation. My anxiety has become so bad in the last 3 years. I wasn’t able to hold a job. I lost contact with many friends and I would rather stay at home with my dog than going out to the world.
I am developing a little bit of agoraphobia.
This isn’t me. I have always been so outgoing, had so many friends and always on the go. Now, I stay at home and only leave to go to my doctors’ appointments. I have 2 doctors that I see on a monthly basis. They are helping me to deal with this horrible mental illness. I’ve been seeing them for about 5 years now and we have not been able to locate the underlying reason for this.
Read more: My Life with Anxiety
I am on medication for anxiety and depression. I saw a therapist and participated in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. I am so over living my life this way. I guess I’m not really living. My life is passing me by as I sit inside and type this story.
The people closest to me don’t understand. They say things like “anxiety isn’t real, get over it”. Sometimes I wish they understood what I’m going through but I wouldn’t wish Anxiety, panic disorder or agoraphobia on my worst enemy. This has so negatively impacted my life. I always had an idea of what my life would be and it’s nowhere close to that. I need help. I want to be myself again.