Overcoming OCD

595
Share This:
Did you know that OCD cannot be cured, but it Can Be Controled very efficiently? Share and Comment to show your Support!

I have been suffering from OCD and depression since I was 10. I haven’t been medicated for this. No one knew what was wrong with me. When I had my first panic attack, people thought I was crazy. Even I thought I was because I didn’t know why I had raising thought, tight chest, dizziness, I couldn’t breathe.  I thought I was having a heart attack and I told my family. They said I was being dramatic and to go back to play with my toys.

I was so frustrated because I didn’t know what was going on. Well, in time those symptoms went away. Then, when I was 14 I remember having obsessive thoughts, anxiety again and performing rituals here and there. I was trying to focus on thinking positive and keeping those thoughts away from my mind by doing distraction and it worked. I was good again, living a happy life but sadly didn’t last. When I was about 15, the thoughts, rituals, anxiety and panic attacks returned. I was obsessed about needle because one day I don’t know how exactly but a needle got stuck in my head. I pulled it out but then I had all these new thoughts coming like what if I didn’t pull it out, what if it was still there, am I going to die, should I tell my family or go to the hospital.

Read more: Techniques For Overcoming Anxiety

They kept coming over and over and the anxiety and panic were so strong that I needed to do the rituals. My rituals were trying to remember everything I did when the event happened, trying to fix all my thoughts, checking my head, getting scan and X-ray done in my head. I knew something was wrong with me because I looked at other people they don’t get obsessed with things, they move on, they don’t have anxiety or panic or depression. I tried really hard to move on. My thoughts, anxiety, depression faded away.

When I was 16, again I was obsessed, this time with mice. I was worried about getting sick because there were mice at my grandma’s house. I would spend 5 hours washing my hands and looking for signs of mice pee or something else in my food.  It was horrible. I have never had help from no one. They just thought I was crazy and couldn’t handle being around me. I was feeling even more depressed knowing that everyone knew that something is wrong with me. I knew it but I didn’t know what was wrong, so in 2010 I came to the United States from the Dominican Republic. I decided that I had to stop washing my hands and doing rituals I pushed through the anxiety and depression and did move on.

Read more: OCD and Anxiety – Two Best Friends

I was recovered from OCD from April 2010 to June 2012. Sadly, my OCD, depression, and panic came back. I couldn’t control them like I used to. It was way too strong, I thought it was the end for me. One day, I will die of a heart attack having panic and anxiety. Every day my depression was so bad, I couldn’t get out of bed and I lost a lot of weight. Well, I was suffering from OCD again from 2012 to 2016. In 2016 I decided that even though I have never been on medication for this, I have to be available to overcome this so I went to therapy exposure and prevention for OCD.

Thank God and my hard work of sitting with the thoughts and anxiety, my last panic attack was in February 2017 – one year ago. I overcame panic attacks, my depression is not so bad like it used to be. I still have thoughts and a little bit of anxiety here and there, but I just keep doing what I been doing and I know how to just let my thoughts come and go with doing rituals. Just let the anxiety come and go. I want to keep recovering. Every day I wake up saying I don’t have time for anxiety panic or depression, I just focus on being happy every day, don’t matter what thoughts come to my mind, don’t matter anxieties or depression, I just focus on the love coming. This is hard, really hard. I didn’t have a good childhood, a lot of bad things have happened to me. Life is even harder when you don’t have support from anyone. I know life can be horrible, but do you want to change that or you want to keep living a horrible life? I have decided to be happy no matter what.

Did you know that OCD cannot be cured, but it Can Be Controled very efficiently? Share and Comment to show your Support!

Source: CureUp

Comments

comments

Share This: